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Wedding RSVP wording for Indian weddings

RSVP wording that actually gets replies at an Indian wedding: how to ask, what to ask for, per-function attendance, deadlines and chasing politely.

marriageproposal.inUpdated 4 min read

RSVP at an Indian wedding is a headcount problem, not an etiquette problem. Ask for a number of people rather than a yes or no, ask per function rather than for the wedding as a whole, give a real deadline with a reason attached, and chase twice. The wording below is written for families who invite in households, because that is who is replying.

Why Western RSVP wording does not work here

The standard "Will you attend? Yes / No" is built around individually addressed guests at a single event with assigned seating. An Indian wedding is usually none of those things: invitations go to households, guests bring family, and there are three to seven functions with different guest lists.

  • Ask "how many will come?", not "will you come?". A yes from a family of six is not one person.
  • Ask per function. Someone at the reception may not be at the muhurtham, and the caterer needs both numbers.
  • Expect the reply from whoever in the household handles this. The name on the invitation is often not the person tapping the button.
  • Expect late replies. Build the deadline around that rather than pretending it will not happen.

How to ask, on the invitation

Warm and clear

Will you be joining us?

It would help us enormously to know how many of you we can expect — just tap below and tell us.

Kindly reply by the 10th of November.

Formal

The favour of a reply is requested by the 10th of November 2026.

Kindly indicate the number of guests attending each function.

Short

Let us know if you're coming — and how many of you 💛

By 10th November, please.

With the reason stated

Please let us know by the 10th of November.

We give the final headcount to the hall on the 12th, and we would much rather count you in than guess.

That last one gets the best response rate, in our experience of what families write, and the reason is not mysterious: a deadline with a reason is a request, and a deadline without one is a rule.

What to actually collect

FieldAsk it?Why
NameAlwaysYou need to know who replied
Number of guestsAlwaysThe whole point of the exercise
Which functionsIf more than onePer-function catering numbers
Dietary needsUsuallyVeg, non-veg, Jain, allergies
Phone numberUsuallyThe only way to reach someone on the day
A message to the coupleOptionalPeople enjoy it and it costs nothing
Travel and stayOnly if you are arranging itDo not ask what you will not act on

Per-function wording

Asking per function

Which functions will you join us for?

Mehendi — Thursday 26th, 4 p.m. How many? ___

Sangeet — Thursday 26th, 7:30 p.m. How many? ___

Muhurtham — Friday 27th, 10:30 a.m. How many? ___

Reception — Friday 27th, 7 p.m. How many? ___

Give each function its date and time on the same line as the question. Guests decide about a function by looking at whether they can get there, and making them scroll back up to check the time is how a reply becomes a "later".

Chasing without nagging

A gentle first chase

Hi! Still hoping to see you on the 27th 💐

We're putting the numbers together this week — could you let us know how many of you can make it?

[link]

And if you can't, that's completely fine, just say so and we'll stop pestering you.

The last call

Final numbers go to the hall tomorrow — if you haven't had a chance yet, could you tap the link and tell us how many?

[link]

Thank you! 💛

To someone who has said no

Completely understood — we'll miss you.

We'll put photographs on the same link afterwards so you can see how it went.

Thank you for the blessings 💛

Two chases, then stop and estimate. The guests who have not replied by the second reminder are mostly people who will turn up anyway, and every experienced caterer knows how to be told that.

Practical numbers

  • Set the RSVP deadline about two weeks before the wedding, and your own internal deadline a week after that.
  • Expect a meaningful share of the list never to reply. Plan for it rather than being surprised by it.
  • Non-repliers who live locally usually attend; non-repliers travelling usually do not. Weight your estimate accordingly.
  • Ask the caterer what tolerance they need and by when — that number is what your deadline should be built backwards from.

RSVP here is per function, collects a headcount and dietary needs, and shows you a running total.

How RSVP works

Part of our guide to Wedding RSVP.

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